Question My daughter is now 34 years old, but she wants to be a teenager againBecause she feels that she missed the pleasure that should have had it at that time. She hates the way she looks, because she thinks she looks older than 16. She wants Plastic and orthodontic surgery to look younger.
She wants to experience university life as tormented again and enjoys the young man, but she also does not want to feel older. She wants to win and get independent, but she is also afraid. She depends on her mother and I am not interested Get a job. She never went out and has no friends. It does not have interests and spends most of its time comparing itself with teenage social media idols.
My daughter says if she cannot return to being a teenager, she wants to die. It is very easy to say the wrong thing. Then she has frightening bouts of hoax and screaming.
I have tried both medications and treatment, but nothing works with it. What can we do?
Philipa responses It seems that your daughter’s life is connected to the Internet, as it is likely to feed the coordinated and ideal images in her body and a feeling of insufficient. Its actions, or their failure, appear to be driven by the external reference. Instead of relying on her feelings and experiences to direct her decisions, she seems to overcome her imagination about what others might think about and feel. These distorted external references can maintain their paralysis, as they try to upgrade the ideal or imaginary judgment level. The transition towards the internal reference would allow her to put herself in her feelings, expertise and values instead of governing her assumptions about the opinions of others. Being stuck in the external reference is a recipe for anxiety and depression.
It seems that it has not yet acquired some necessary life skills, namely: tolerance with frustration, flexibility, problem solving and sympathy. Many people learn these skills early, but for others, it takes much longer. The good news is that they are all learning and that your daughter can develop in her pace with correct support.
I am also worried about her isolation and suicide ideas. It appears to be stuck in a course of unacceptable comparison with others, which exacerbate the online spaces. Many professionals may suggest diagnoses such as autism, border personality disorder, hyperactivity disorder, attention lack or bilateral disorder. Although stickers can sometimes help on context behaviors, I believe that the focus should be on equipping them with the tools and skills you need to move forward, regardless of any sign.
Collective therapy, especially in a residential environment, can help it start this process. In such an environment, she will have the opportunity to interact with others, practice basic skills and build confidence in relationships. Facilities such as the Brewri Hospital in Roecapton or Nightingale Hospital in London offer organized programs that may help individuals to develop the social and emotional skills needed for personal growth. Instead, you may benefit from something like Hoffmann operation -A week -long residential cycle, intense treatment. All of these treatments require money and some self -stimulation. Treatment is not a negative treatment, it is not similar to the cream that you rub in a rash, as it requires work by the patient.
Your daughter’s fear of independence can be associated with her lack of her belief in her ability to overcome her. It needs to understand that independence does not mean that it is completely self -sufficient. Humans are interconnected. We rely on each other in mutual healthy ways.
It is also important to distinguish between “rescue” and “support”. Rescue involves doing things that she is able to do for herself, such as managing her money. Rescue enhances her dependency and undermines her confidence in her capabilities. In contrast, her support means encouraging her to take responsibility for her life while providing encouragement and being a safety network when needed. Family therapy can all help you create and maintain borders while improving communication. By retracting the rescue of behaviors, your daughter will need to take small but significant steps towards independence.
The development of the internal reference, skills building, and learning confidence in itself and others can occur at any stage of life. These transformations, though gradually, can lead to a life in which you feel more foundations, ability and connected. Personally, I think plastic surgery and orthodontics will be a disaster for it. It would consolidate the mentality of its external reference.
I did not meet you or your daughter, so my advice is limited. I think the best option will be a psychiatrist and is also a psychiatrist. If the treatment works depends on the relationship between the therapist and the patient, so if this does not succeed in the first time, this never means. Likewise with the drug, a different approach may also help.
Recommended reading: Searching for nature: a new approach to understanding mental health, distress and nervous diversity by Sami Timimi
If you have been affected by any of these issues, please call Samaritans On Freephone 116 123, or call mind
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